failure, and hope

I find it ironic that after writing yesterday's blog and having similar conversations with friends, today would be one of my grumpiest days ever at work. I didn't exactly call anyone a mean name, but I sure did let people and circumstances bother me excessively, and I complained a LOT. It's frustrating to fail, to prove myself weak and flawed. It's so much easier to talk about Jesus than to actually act like him.

And yet, there's hope. Tomorrow is a new day. This moment is a new moment.

Beyond that, there's the hope of heaven. This is what I mentioned yesterday when I said I had more on my mind; I've been thinking of heaven a lot these days. I've been contemplating what is really means to be the bride of Christ, longing for the day when I will truly be entirely satisfied and see him face to face and exist in the tangible presence of God. I want to live without fear and neediness, and see what grand implications that will have on my relationships with my brothers and sisters.

Obviously, we're to be striving for this sort of contentment with God here in this life, and there are moments when I feel close to true contentment. But there are also times when I feel alone, confused, estranged, and really just exhausted by life. In both of these times, hoping in heaven is essential. Hope of completion grants you closeness in the present. On the one hand, we never want to be too comfortable away from our true home. Yet on the other hand, we never want to despair of life itself and doubt God's love and purpose for us.

I feel like I'm rambling now. To sum it up, I'm excited for the day when all of my relationships, with God and everyone else, will be exactly as they were meant to be. And until then, it's going to be hard, but I'm going to work to embody the love that Christ calls us to live.

As a side note, if anyone has any insight as to what it means for us to be the bride of Christ, feel free to share it. Also, feel free to share any reasons why you look forward to heaven. Thanks!